Deeper Dating Online › Forums › Wiser Path 2013 › Gift Circle
02/11/2013 at 1:54 pm #831
I finally did the gift circle exercise, even though I was one of the folks that was avoiding it like the plague. I asked 3 people via e-mail… too chicken shit to ask them face-to-face. I asked my parents and then my best friend (who is also an ex-lover, coincidentally).
At first, both my parents asked for clarification of the assignment, which made me wonder whether I should have asked them at all. Normally, I would never have asked my dad, especially, for this type of thing so choosing to ask him was an important step since one of the things I have thought about a lot during this class is how our relationship has always been a distant one, of me longing for him to show more love toward me but him being unable to express emotions.
Anyhow, the feedback from my parents was interesting. They didn’t provide a whole lot and a lot of things weren’t so much “core gifts.” (Like one of them was “Tara has a beautiful smile.”) But, that being said, they included things I never realized they valued in me. No surprise that neither mentioned “spirituality” as a core gift (I converted to another religion, which was very painful for them and a continuing source of strife), however my mom listed “high integrity.” I was like “WOW.” I would never have thought she would have said that.
The feedback from my friend was more helpful to me in the sense that it resonated more with me. He basically listed most of the core gifts that I have identified in the class (spiritual, loving, intuitive), plus he added about 3 more that never would have occurred to me (resilient, powerful, compassionate, inquisitive). Actually he said “extremely compassionate.” I don’t think of myself as being compassionate. That one was interesting to me. I think, though, that it is like what Ken said about it being the ocean we swim in and we are the fish. We just can’t see it because we assume all humans are like us. I am going to cut & paste what he wrote:
In terms of your “core gifts,” I would say that you’re extremely compassionate and attuned to the suffering and plight of others. You’re very spiritual and are both connected and looking for connection to the flow of the Universe whether through religion or spirituality. You are extremely resilient even after taking some very hard blows. You are also very loving and are hungry to give and share your love with others. At times, you can be very intuitive. You are also very powerful. You are inquisitive and always looking for what’s really going on below the surface of things.02/11/2013 at 11:39 pm #833
Oh, Tara, what your friend wrote is so beautiful! I smiled as I was reading it. It’s funny because just looking at your picture a lot of what you described about yourself comes across. You seem positive and happy in your picture!
It seemed to me that one friend wrote what she sent me in a rush but I was grateful nonetheless. To be honest, taking this class has shown me that all of us are very strong and courageous to be willing to examine ourselves and our relationships so deeply. With all of the pain that most of us have experienced, I realize that it takes a brave and loving spirit to be willing to take this level of inventory of our selves.
So, I don’t think you were a “chicken shit” (LOL) at all! You have been consistently brave in everything with t his class. Plus, it’s nice to have it in email because you’ll always have it in writing!!!
P.S. I wish I could share a photo but I couldn’t figure out how to upload!
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